Although I'm a pretty big horror
fan, I've never been much for these summer "based-on-a-true-story" flicks
that are very, very loosely based on real events. Films like, The Blair Witch Project and The Amityville Horror have never been
attractive to me. At least not as much as the independent psychological horror
films: Antiviral, Teeth, Deadgirl, etc.. I'm not interested in ghosts or exorcisms or
slashers. But, The Conjuring garnered
quite a bit of positive attention, even critics liked it. There were rumours,
too, that it was scary and fresh. So, when my close friends invited me to go, I
decided I'd give it a shot--despite my weak heart.
First of all, this movie is scary. It isn't psychologically
scary, mind you. I didn't leave feeling overwhelmed with existential dread; I
didn't have nightmares after watching it; And, I didn't jump at my ringing
phone (it's been more than seven days anyway, so I think I'm safe). I did,
however, cover my eyes, hug my friend's arm, and plug my ears throughout my
viewing experience.
The film concerns the demonic
haunting of the Perron family. They move into a dilapidated barn house in the
middle of nowhere and immediately begin having paranormal experiences. Mrs.
Perron wakes up with inexplicable black bruises while the Perron children have
trouble sleeping because the house is cold and stinky at night. Doors slam,
clocks stop, littlest daughter sees dead people, etc., etc. Instead of moving,
the Perron family seeks the expertise of paranormal investigators, Ed and
Lorraine Warren. The movie escalates from there.
What I like best about The Conjuring is that the directors seem
to know that horror-goers aren't necessarily watching these films to see the
scariest monsters, ghosts, and demons. They know that it's what you don't see
that's scariest. In fact, there's one scene in particular that really got to
me. In this scene, an invisible entity keeps pulling Christine Perron's foot as
she sleeps. Christine wakes up and frantically warns her sleeping sister that
there is something menacing staring at them behind the door. Like Christine's
sister, I kept staring at the darkness behind the door searching for a figure.
I couldn't see anything! Not a face, a leg, or a hand. But my heart was pounding
and I was cowering behind my make-shift hair curtain. This is why this movie is
good. This is why this movie is actually scary. The film managed to get me
holding my breath and biting my nails without using some crappy CGI demon.
The Conjuring is full of unexpected scares. But, even the expected scares are unsettling. For example, I found the clapping game the Perron children play throughout the film effectively frightening. It wasn't overused or comedic. It was right on point.
Applause now gives me 'nam flashbacks. Thanks, The Conjuring! |
Ending preferences aside, The
Conjuring is a fairly frightening film and it's worth a watch. I'd give it
a 3.5/5.
SPOILERS AHEAD If you've seen the film, here are
my questions/critiques:
1.
Annabelle the doll is scary. Like, really scary.
Why would anyone buy her for a child in the first place? And, dolls don't have
muscles, so how could she possibly write those vague messages (No we didn't
miss you, you're a fucking doll and we're 25 years old, that would be weird).
2.
What did Lorraine see when she touched the
possessed man? I feel like his possession would have been way more compelling
than Mrs. Perron's. Prequel?
3.
Mr.
Perron knows that his wife is the target of the demonic possession, yet he
leaves her with the children at the hotel while he goes to buy some groceries.
He likes to play fast and loose with his children, I guess.
4.
Mrs. Perron nearly kills her children, but she
is never detained or questioned by the police. I know there's a cop at the
exorcism, but I doubt his cop friends would accept the oldest murdery excuse in
the book, "The demon made me do it!"
...Next time you've murdered
someone, you should get your lawyer to try this defense. I want to see if it
actually works.
5.
Why didn't the Perrons investigate, even
briefly, the history of their new house (before buying it)? I know the film
takes place in the 70's, so google isn't a thing yet (that's a horror story for
another day, kids), but that doesn't work as an excuse here. Mrs. Warren is
able to find a whole pile of recorded suicides, disappearances, and murders
that took place in or near that house. It looked like her research didn't take more than a day to find, either.